Good morning :)
Would you believe that I've been sitting here looking at my computer screen for well over 30 minutes... I know?! It's not even 6am... yet here I sit like a kid at school not knowing what the hell to do.
My thoughts are rampant though. I feel like the ideas, emotions, stressers, excitements flying through my head sounds like a garage band trying to figure shit out. There's a couple good cords and then there are other shit ones... it's like "bro!", give it a break.
The challenge with that terrible sound in my head is that I still need to follow through on my commitment of a Grateful Friday message.... but it sounds like shit up there. Meanwhile all I can "legitimately" hear is the second hand tick away from my watch. Every now and then the computer fan pulls air hard then turns off... to my screen to the right, a beach is shown. Much like the fan running on my computer... I can hear the back and forth of the tide come in and out.
As I prepare this, I understand what post this is... today is #175. At the suggestion of many friends at post #75 I started gratefulman.com... While I try to get some mental traction and make something kinda special, kinda cool. That damn band in my head can't get their shit together.
The universe might be telling me that I need to take some time off, cause lord do I feel it, but.. there are things that need to be done, people that need to be served, and shit that needs to be built.. I'll take tomorrow off instead.
In an effort to keep the band from pissing off the neighbors, I need to turn off the power so the members can think about the next cord, rather than just make a mess of a sound. The important thing is that I didn't take the easy road out and say, nope, not publishing anything cause it's not my best... but sometimes your best is just showing up, although easy to say, it's really hard when you care...
In this case, it's #175 and I needed to show up.
It's silly, but as I talk like that, I can't help but see in my mind, someone celebrating a milestone birthday, but on a street corner or an island, by themselves. You know it's a big one, but.. it's not shaking out the way such a thing should..
But that's ok... the mind and heart know, and that's what counts.
There will be others, until then, I think someone called the cops cause it's late, really noisy, and the band needs to quit playing for today.
Have a grateful weekend friend :)