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A Cure for no Toilet Paper!

Well hello there friend...

Would you believe that this is the "SECOND" grateful email I'm writing???..


I was up at just before 5am today... was jacked! had spent about a week on what I was going to write... got to it! laughing, joking, writing, laughing... then in total Josh fashion I didn't have enough time... it was time to leave, time to take turd children to school.. I asked Chas for like 5 more min so I could wrap things up... shit! need to proof! saved draft, will proof in the Tahoe...

Well that was a big total waste of time.. in my midst of proofing and things not doing what they were supposed to... shit got discarded, deltetd... gone son. 2 hours of nothing for nothing.... like trying to tell a funny joke again but the laughs are gone...

dude I was HOT! I was so, SO MAD!!

I was thinking well, way to start a shit Friday the 13th... the week had already kinda kicked us in the ass... why not just piss away a free two hours that I can't get back.

The rain hasn't stopped, I'm pruning up just smelling it... Chas and the whole world at home is or has been sick. No matter my efforts, I'm trying to dodge the bullets Chas is coughing and sneezing at me all the time...

My precious bride lost another close family member this week... :( Her second mom, her nanny, her godmother passed away this Wednesday to her 4 year battle with cancer. Being just 2 months after her mom passed, it was a rough week. Furthermore, today is also the 7 year anniversary of having lost my good buddy Chris.

and there's no damn toilet paper! DUDE!

So all that being said, I was hella mad, like bad kinda mad this morning.. I know my attitude totally shit in the kids cheerio ride to school as well. I put a shit ton of emotion and care into these Friday posts.. so I wasn't happy for nothing. Thankfully Chas was in really good spirits and that motivated me to just be ok and get better. Had a good couple calls this AM that kicked up my needed dopamine fix...

although shit be stanky this week... there's a lot to be thankful for... a lot to be grateful for.. even at my own expense. >D

so I'm gonna give this another go.... maybe with a slight buzz now that it's happy hour time.. >D >D

I do have some good news!

I found the cure to no toilet paper!!

If you need, I am a qualified installer for this kind of tool! hahah! I legit came across this at a house we were showing some clients last year. I'm not sure if it was the golden ticket or not, but they bought the home, booty sprayer and all! hahah! :)

Another thing that helps deal with the lack of TP and also combat the Corona Virus... is well..


specifically Corona Extra

Although it does the job in combating the virus, it pales in comparison to my buddy Jose.. He's less bloaty and lacks the carbs which my body does not like.

When I took this pic, Chas was like "that looks like it belongs in a magazine!"... I was like, "it looks like the cup holder is too small!" hahah :) for the record, I would never.

Over the past year since having changed our diet, I needed to let go of all the sweet, high octane alcohol beverages.. (no thanks to my younger brother) .. so I legit needed to acquire a man card and go buy man drinks.. in my case that started off as Whiskey but after a pizza and beer visit with a client, he ruined me forever...

Jose + Simply Lime = poormans margarita...

and buddy... I tell you. dude!

turns me into an easy date! :)

it feels like sunshine in a cup! It feels like summer all the time.

I take my 3-4ish shots of Jose, a shots/splash's worth of simply lime, mix that shit in my game of thrones cup! and blizam! liquid sunshine!

I have come to find my limits though... I've always been a chill kinda drinker. never angry, emotional, just chill and chiller...

After a gud victory day of handyman work I enjoy a nice single beverage. It loosens me up...

Should the night warrant it... if I have about two or so.. I'm hummin... at times so are my words... can sound a bit slanted if you will, but I'm good. Not good to drive, but now I'm chilln hard.

I've found that when I hit three... well bro... I usually dont give a damn about what I'm eating or how much... after that, I'm in a food coma..

then 4 drinks.. dude. I'm loose like a flat tire. worthless. .. just funny to look at really. That's usually a long day like a superbowl kinda day.

the other day I had been fasting for almost 20+ hours.. I had a victorious gud day... rather than having some food substance prior to my corona virus medicine, - ha! I just had about 3...

one, two, sree, f... oh so seepy..

unbeknownst to me.. yup! ... a great picture of a flat tire hahha!

Damnit Chas! >D

Now... If you're ever down for something other than a takillya drink, you should try this...

A close friend of mine had too much Jameson one night and we were switching things up... we ended up mixing Jameson and heavy whipping cream.. we called is a "wha-wha" whiskey and whipping cream...being a marketing type that name didn't sit well with me...after more thought we were inspired by the white russian, vodka and cream... so we called this a white cowboy...

might have chosen the wrong kind of whiskey for the name, but it was damn good...

Tullamore dew is another hella awesome and smooth whiskey too... this is mixed in our Victor Newman glasses... if you don't know Victor Newman, please ask Chas.. I'm pleading the 5th! hahah! :)

I called my buddy one night and there was a connection error... but more so he was mid gulp when he answered... he said "dude, I was knee deep in a white cowboy when I answered"... HAHHAHAH we died of laughter.. still laughing right now! ..

don't ever say "knee deep in a cowboy!" HAAHAHHAHA! >D

SO.... Maybe you're not a mixing type! I got you! ....


If you can find this stuff, it's AMAZING!

Pre poormans margarita, err'yone knew I was on a whiskey kick.. so for my birthday a friend bought me some peanut butter whiskey... like holy hell bro! DUDE! that evening I was able to have one shot... that's it... err'yone else killed the bottle... it wouldn't be for almost another 4-6 months before I would find it again....

Since then we've shared the flavor bomb with err'ybody! it's the best $25 all day. My second Dad up in Nevada sent us this magazine worthy pic of it... beautifully framed around the mountains of Nevada... dude.. I can taste the cold smooth flavor of peanut butter... I'm telling you! hella gud!

You might be thinking, dude! what's with all the alcohol pics... well, many are mine, but close people to me also send me their pics too... so it's like a virtual high five of stuff... i totally dig it!

In my opinion, this stuff and all whiskeys are best served direct from the freezer over a "whiskey wedge glass"...

I've shared this glass with a number of clients, they were quick to pick one up. :) If nothing else, it's a hella of a cool glass. Feels way more manly than a Victor Newman glass.... although that's a pretty classy, pinkies up kinda glass... so depending on your mood rock what you wanna.

As I come to a close on this playful alcohol recipe, I'm drawn back to my good buddy Chris. Turns out in his grown up years he was a Jameson kind of guy.

Yesterday afternoon, Chris's mom sent me this awesome picture in honor of today. A team of soldiers in front of the building named after him on Coronado Island in California.

Although I'm out of Jameson, I'm tipping one back for you buddy! RIP friend.

And another tip back for Miss Nanny Tina <3... you and Nanna Dale are looking down on us sending high fives as well. <3

We hope you have an amazing Friday the 13th and an awesome weekend! :)

Although this grateful post has now taken 4 hours to produce, it was worth it to keep after it and being consistent. I hope the humor brightens your day. Please send me a pic of you and your beverage! it'd warm my heart!

Have a grateful weekend!

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